The lights pierce into these green eyes
giving the only punishment they can give.
And the walls stare down with that same
white, disgusted snarl to mock my existence.
The bars --oh the window bars!-- they are the worst.
Taunting me with freedom over and over again.
Through the spaces I see light, and I see life!
I see the perfectly perfect life I once had!
But my old mind only plays cruel tricks now.
I know I will never again see real sunlight.
Not unless I am dead and headed Elsewhere.
But; I know I gave up Heaven long before here.
The guilt! Here it comes back again. Quickly!
Even though I simply stare and count white bricks,
It slowly creeps back into my weary, harmless mind
To remind. And harass. And remind. And replay.
But I must not think of those dark memories now!
I must focus on life now and how I can improve.
So my walls and doors don't have to be plush again.
So I can better my self when I leave this quiet place.
Or if I ever leave this wretchedly quiet place.
This is great! As I read it, I feel like I'm in a sanitarium or an insane asylum.
ReplyDeleteWow. I love this poem! I can imagine being in a white padded cell would make me feel trapped, too.
ReplyDeleteI also like how you capitalized Elsewhere, and the hyphens in the second stanza are very Emily Dickinson-esque. In fact, the whole poem feels very Emily, actually, have you been reading her anthology in your spare time?? (Hey, I can dream, can't I?)
Nice work.
I love this poem! I can actually see what it is like to be trapped in a cell.
ReplyDeleteGood job CATLYN!